Just A Drive by

Well, it's hot in Houston and that leads to staying inside most of the time. I haven't written in a long while and there may some wondering what's the deal. The deal is...life, stressors, challenges, daily stuff getting in the way and dog paddling on course.
The folks I bowl with are still smiling over my changed looks. They call me 'skinny' and smile from ear to ear. I am a much smaller me than in the past and I'm still very pleased with that. However, you've heard the term 'stuff happens' -- it does.
And, lately 'stuff' has been getting in the way. Momentarily, I guess I've lost the 'happy' in my eyes and smile. Not sure where it's retreated, but I'm sure it will return one of these days. So, a picture is worth a thousand words, but I refuse to post a smile without 'happy' attached.
I'm searching for it high and low with confidence it's within reach. When I find it, I'll share it again. Until then, I'm continuing to do various things in order to 'jump start' the loss again.
I hope every reader is having a great summer of fun...perhaps traveling or engaged in a new project you love.
For me, I'll keep searching until I recapture the happy piece of my life. Until then, if you run into that 'piece', would ya send it UPS special delivery? It'll be appreciated.

Summer Reflections

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June, it's never been this hot this early before! The days are sizzlin' and so am I! Yesterday presented an opportunity for some self reflection in this journey. When I put the calculator to the figures, I'm really on course with all of this.

To date, I've actually lost .44 pounds per day. That's taking the 46 divided by number of days, etc. And, inches have dropped...30+. Size is still changing and so am I.

I have made an important change backwards. With bariatric surgery of any kind, many folks get consumed with protein, protein, protein. In short, that can be highly detrimental. Following some in-depth research on this topic, I've concluded that 50 grams of protein per day is very adequate for banded people. Previously I was working to consume 70-90 per day. That's a lot!

Thus, I've reintroduced fruits into my daily diet and have diverted my attention from the Protein bars. I will have one ever so, depending on daily schedule and what's going on, but, I am in the MENTAL WAR and striving to break habits again. Three meals a day and one interesting snack is a must for me. I've kicked up my coffee and some other drinks with Torani Sugar Free Syrups. Great flavors and fun tastes. For those dealing with Starbucks habits, try some of these...you can copy what you order at the counter!

As I shopped in Randall's yesterday, I hesitated at the blood pressure machine. The person before me had a nice reading, left open to see, and I pumped me up! It was kina good...111/60!! Need I say more?

These little things are the driving forces in my life change today. That b/p is without any scripts for over three months now. My BMI has dropped by 11 points and my walkig abitlity is normal. Anytime Michael says, "man, you're flyin', I'm havin' to really walk fast to keep up with you"...you know you've improved drastically. And that's just shopping the grocery stores and Walmart!!

The past several days I've been opening the http://www.lapbandertalk.com/ site. There are so many curious people, experienced people, lost in the dark people and the list goes on. A positive part of that for me today is the simple goodness in seeing what others are struggling to overcome or accomplish in their battles. My other support site is http://www.obesithelp.org/. When I go through before and after pics of fat folks, I get pumped! I'm on my way!

Since the last fill, my eating has improved greatly, meaning, 99% goes down and stays down! I'm not sure what's changed, but something's different. I return on the 15th for fill number 4 and that should be a real winner. If I'm not right at the 'spot', I'm within inches of it. We'll see what comes from next fill.

As I reflect over the past many years in this battle of the bulge, I always return to age 10/11. That was a summer of very hard work, not only on my part, but my mother's as well. We left Hillcrest hospital that spring with a 1000 calorie, very strict diet. And, I do mean diet! But, by the Fall of my Jr. High beginning, I was a skinny minny.

It's always important to realize what our good health means to those who love us. Michael is excited over this trek. He has seen the 'other' me, locked in a recliner. Yes, he's the nephew of the world reknown chef, James Beard and yes, the food is superb in this house. If you google James Beard, you will see an older version of my husband, Michael!!

In his twenties, Michael attended Paul Prudhomme's Cooking School in New Orleans. Can you say 'cajun flavors'? Can you say blackened anything? Can you say gumbo to lay down and die for? Sauces are a specialty of my husband. Prior to banding, yum and more yum. He still does sauces, but minus the butter...shucky dern!

He cooks now with all the flavors, seasonings, fresh basil, etc and the taste is to die for. Dinner last evening was tender, juicy, Delmonico steak, seared romaine (off the grill) and baked potato. We split one steak, we split one potato and we each had a serving of the romaine. The steak was topped with mushrooms prepared with salt, pepper, sauteed onions, soy and balsamic vinegar (for acidity)!! If you need a superb sauce for your steak, get the skillet down and do it!!

Our meals are free of heavy fat, butter, oil, etc. Clean cooking and something to look forward to each evening. The only problem with me these days....some days I have no desire to even speak of food. On those days, we do our 'own thing' and graze. However, there is a danger in grazing. If you're not careful, you can get way off track.

For my sweet tooth, I eat Teddy Grahams, sugar free fudgecicles, sugar free popsicles, sugar free jello and sometimes, Graham cracker. Lately, bananas and apples are back in and I found a Marzetti's 100 calorie fruit dip. I use about a half of one of those for fruits. So, now, you have some insight on banded Pat!

Do I suffer frustration with all of this? YES AND YES, AGAIN. Do I sometimes withdraw from the world with this? Yep. But, I always refocus and jump back on track. This is a journey for a bander, not a destination. This is not a magic fix...the conciensious part of this journey must stay in tact until "death do us part". This will go on the REST OF MY LIFE. Now you understand the importance of strong mental attitude and self control.

Cheer for those you know who are battling weight. Offer words of encouragement. Develop a bit of empathy for those folks because...until you've walked a mile in their shoes, you KNOW NOTHING!

Pay it forward this week and smile at a stranger! And, if you see a sweet little senior adult struggling in the aisle of the supermarket, offer a kind gesture. You know not what they're going home to face.

Dear Lap Band

Image via Wikipedia

I've crossed many bridges in the past weeks and months. Thanks to you, the crossings are getting somewhat easier with each new dawn. Changes of the mind, heart, body and perspective morph with each night's sleep and bring new expectations to life within me.

Bringing you into my life has been the best thing I've ever done for myself. Often I wonder, why didn't I do this sooner? I'm sure though that there are many times we simply find it hard to embrace the possibilities of something so life-changing happening to us. I did.

But, thanks to you...life's very different today. This was my first day back to the Family Life Center at church to begin my walking program. There was a time in the Fall, 04 where I would go to walk and only complete a quarter lap before having to stop and 'suck' in oxygen to be able to go again. By springtime, 05 I was somewhat better. I could walk in half-laps with breathing intervals in between. I thought I was doing someting!

Today, after March, 09 surgery and quick loss of 46 pounds, I hit the floor decked out in new gym shoes and new attitude. I began my walk at 12:15, walking just a tad above a strong slow walk...crossed back over the beginning after lap one, still breathing very well.

Lap 2, lap 3, lap 4...took a brief pause just 'cause. Wow! 4 solid laps without thinking twice! I'm stoked. I continued and did the next four...same repeat. When 20 minutes had passed, I had done a mile and a tenth. Now, for many readers, that's nothing. To a person coming back into life at age 60, that's pretty darn terrific.

In addition to that good news, I thank you personally for the following....
being able to pull and buckle my seatbelt (like normal folks do)
being able to sit comfortably in the movie chairs and smile...I fit
the ability to sit in a booth in any establishment (no embarrassment of hesitating when asked)
not having people stare at me on the mall or in a restaurant
being able to buy real clothes again...not being limited to Cahterine's for big chicks!
putting on tennis shoes, bending my knee to cross the other, no pain, no fuss
being able to lay down and breathe easy, sleeping soundly all night long
the ability to cross my legs again
being able to prop a foot up on my recliner and sit comfortably for a great change
fitting in the store bathroom stalls (yep, that's a challenge for a fat gurl)
the ability to walk among folks on the mall or whereever, matching their normal pace
(I've had many past days prior to where I became an expert at disguise...pretending to browse while my lungs 'caught up'...no need for that now)
having a smile that causes some friendly waves in my cheeks, meaning their gettin' skinny
having friends comment on 'how great you look'....they can see I'm healthy again
and, if I ever fly again, I can buckle that dang seatbelt and PULL IT TIGHTER!!! yeeehaawww

You have been instrumental in the physical changes in my life. The rest of the story is up to me. Although I fight the BRAIN WAR daily, I am abiding by the new required protein rules and such. I do have times where my mind urges me to snack, graze, have crunchies, etc...Remember, you fixed my tummy...you didn't adjust my mind!!

And, so, it was a time to say thank you in a different way. I anxiously await more time to pass and see where I go with all of this new life. The best part is to understand how valuable every day is to me now. Not wasting breath nor movement is essential and keeping it tuned to activity a priority.
My sweet mother had a fantastic life phrase regarding life..."it's all about quality, not quantity".
I've recaptured the quality, now I'll move forward and see what the quantity meter allows!

All of these things are due to your positive effects and again, I say thank you from my much better working heart!!

I close with a smile,

Pat
personal goal...to PAY IT FORWARD!!!!!!!

Reflections of the BEGINNING

In the Fall of 2008, my life really began to change. I was still miles from the actual surgery, but appointments, advice, workshops and more began to fill my calendar. Change was in the wind and on the horizon. My thoughts began to meld into 'We've got trouble, right here in River City...' life had dealt me a tricky hand, but the MUSIC MAN was going to bale me out!

As I met with each individual on my diverse TEAM of BCM professionals, new thoughts began to infiltrate my mind. It was coming clear that major changes in attitude, choices and old habits had to made a complete 360 in order to facilitate success over the coming months.

Although a challenging process, a very rewarding process as well. Many people struggle with habits daily, no, they're not having surgery for their weight issues, but, still age and habits strongly affect us as we grow older.

A few tips given me in the early stages were:

Do not eat while you're doing something else. Eat at a certain place -- your special place! My special place is at the dining room table. Forget the television...you are EATING.

Knock out poor habits. I was in the teaching profession for 30 years. We had 20 minute lunches and had to be back in class on the bell!! Can you say SCARF? Slow down and take a long time to chew, think about texture and flavor and get some pleasure out of your food.

Do not keep high calorie foods available! Plan your meals, create your list before you walk through the door and stick to it! Low caloried snacks such as pretzels, graham crackers and fresh veggies and fruits work!

Increase your activity! Make 10,000 steps a day your goal! Sneak in exercise by parking at the end of the big lot...walk, walk, walk! Walk at a faster pace and use the stairs instead of the elevator!

8 cups of water a day is a MUST! Drinking water, refreshes, creates a healthier you and will drecrease your capacity for snacks!

Be honest with yourself.

Those things initiated change in my life. At first, I flirted with them. Then, I became interested in it all. Finally, I put most of it into action! Becoming healthy is hard work and it's 24/7. If you can't engage your mind, body and spirit in the essentials, you will suffer defeat!

Fuel was added to my fire with the letter from Aetna to my Primary Care Physician, Dr. Rogers. My BMI was 47.71 which is greater than 35 compatible with the medically significant obesity and 40 or greater indicating morbid obesity. Well, if that wasn't enough of an insult and eye-opener...try more from the letter...

"This patitnet has tried numerous methods to lose weight in the past without lasting success including Atkins, Jenny Craig, Sugar Busters, T.O.P.S. and Weight Watchers. She has always lost weight but has been unable to sustain the loss always gaining more than was lost".

Here's a list of my co-morbidities:

1. Diabetes Type II

2. Hypertension

3. Secondary Pulmonary Hypertension

4. Congestive Heart Failure

5. Sleep Apnea on bipap machine nightly

6. Hyperlipidemia

7. Restless Leg Syndrome

I had all qualifying co-morbidities that insurance companies consider. Insulting to myself! To see my history in print was SHOCKING in more ways than anyone will ever know. I am proud to say today, my BMI is down to 37.2! Thank you for your applause!

My weight is down 46 pounds and smiling.

My blood pressure has been normal since the day after...no more meds...per my PCP.

My blood sugar has been normal since the day after...no more meds...per my PCP.

My lungs are functioning normally these days...can do a flight of stairs and keep sailing.

Cholesterol is down to 179.

All of the above should enlighten you and perhaps offer some insight to your personal journey with weight. Significant changes in your lifestyle today can afford you an enriched life in the coming future. Think of your children and grandchildren. Now you know they're all going to do some fantastic things in life. Stick around, get a healthy snack and watch their lives unfold. Hey, without you, they wouldn't be able to entertain ya!!!

Change, Challenge, Choice

Seasons mean change. We deal with marvelous cool days, sweltering hot days and very few ice cold days in the great city of Houston, Texas. But, change is inevitable and we must go with the flow. In the long, blistering days of summer in Texas, I must be brave! Honestly, the heat can almost take your breath away.

Over the course of time, however, we find a happy place and make it through a better person, perhaps. This is a new season in my life. For those folks who've been following since July, 2008, you've had perspective and insight on some of my thoughts and challenges. However, here's the new change that has taken place since surgery.

My personality. That's right. My husband, Michael and I have had very lively discussions regarding the 'new me'. It's all good, but, according to him, "you are not the same person I married"! That's right, I've lost half a person...getting close to one, real new one. Attitude's affected with all of this as well. I've always been assertive and I guess...IT'S BAAAAaaaccckk!

So what has brought that discussion into focus? I've always been a mover and a shaker. But for the past three years, each day had incarcerated me as a 'prisoner of my recliner'. When you don't have adequate oxygen saturation, you're hesitant to take too many steps. And, when you do, you pause frequently to allow the lungs to CATCH UP!

Well, folks, that's a tremendous difference in me today. I do have oxygen supply. I do have energy. I do have a desire to run and gun! Much of this causes 'stress' in the living of each day. To sit in front of the television for a long period of time now is a challenge to me. And, so, in the past...if I had excess energy or needed to burn any 'anxious' moments -- I IRONED!! These days, I clean, I do laundry, I reorganize closets, I take 'junk' out of rooms and store it and the list goes on!!!

You read that one right as well. It was just a 'thang' I did. Back then, the ironing was connected to stressful moments over a parent struggling to live. Those were tough days and they had to be dealt with in order to stay on track!

A major change for me today is food. Appearance. Taste. Nutritional qualities. Amount. Does it sound good or not necessary. These things are hard for you to understand. However, food has become a means to live. My role's reversed and I no longer live to eat. It does, though, affect the one(s) you live with!!! And, at times, it's very aggravating to Michael.

Remember, I'm filling a 4 ounce pouch. Doesn't take much. Needs to be protein rich and little or no carbs! Aggravating? Perhaps. Essential? Absolutely.

And, so, I will work on my new attitude daily, but I will remain constant in my personal needs and desires at the dining table! I don't wish to waste time. Junk food is in days gone by. Hello new life. Hello new body. Hello new attitude (can't hep it). And, hello WORLD! Pat's here to stay!

One final note for today. I've come to the 'fork in the road' where I settle into slow weight loss. Hopefully, 5 pounds a month, according to Dr. Sherman. And, so, that's very acceptable. I had a whirlwind beginning. Surpassed all others 'coming out of the gate' and left them in my tracks! It's been a mind changing battle...but, it takes time and thanks to the great Baylor College of Med Team...I THANK I HAVE SUM TIME!!!

Third Fill Today...I'm Runnin' in High Again!

Image by oOElenaOo via Flickr

Greetings on a very hot June afternoon! My visit went well with Dr. Sherman today. I had LOST 2 pounds and he was pleased. Our discussion focused on now, perhaps, I'm to the point where possibly 5 or more will drop per week.

As I've stated prior to today...this is all a P R O C E S S!! Although I had pounds pour rapidly immediately after this dance began, it had to slow at some point! My spirits are lifted again and I'm prepared to boogie on down the path!

My compliments to all of my surgical 'team' at BCM! Those are some of the most wonderful people in the world. One thing I didn't realize when this began that I suddenly was wrapped in my own little world of tremendous doctors and specialists! What a change in this kids life!!

Dr. Sherman's 'right arm' came into the exam room after the stick and fill. It was necessary for me to change next month's appointment due to a weekend trip to Dallas. iteachTEXAS is having our annual Conference and, although I tried to skip, I was informed it was a necessary thing!! Monica is so terrific.

As she opened my FILE to check numbers/stats and such, we began a discussion. They always begin with "how are you doing"? My reply is always with a smile..."I'm great. I've had early success and tremendous health rewards"! Then, she said, "it's your three month, I need new pics before you leave"! OMG!

She showed me the two original pics of me the week before surgery. Holy cow!! I looked like death dressed in all black as I always wore in past days!! Unbelievable!! Yes, there's a new me and I can't wait for the next several months to walk by.

Today, I understand. I know where I'm at in this scenerio, I know that I'm into the right hand lane for slow traffice (and, that's okay) ... but most of all ... I know this is still the best thing I have ever done in my entire life!!!

May each of you have something remarkable happen in your life this week. Matters not if it's simple or complex ... it just matters that something happen! Wishes for a great weekend!